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Veronica Mars Fodder

Veronica Mars: I Know What You'll Do Next Summer

Gotta hand it to you, VMars writers. In the show's 11th hour you are really stepping it up. It's just too bittersweet we won't see these storylines fully flushed out because CW IS KILLING ONE OF THE ONLY GOOD THINGS LEFT ON TELEVISION.

Deep breath. I can get through this. I promise I'll only mention the tragic, tragic news 82 more times and that's it.

This week's episode tried to tackle an important and serious issue, child conscription in Uganda, but as always, when the scope widens to somewhere outside of Neptune, it seems just there for the heck of it. Yes it showed one more instance of why Veronica is Veronica [You trust someone and they turn out to be a fraud, therefore I will be cynical and not trust anyone], but the parts of the plot that exist in the bubble of SoCal are far more exciting.

The Hearst freshmen are trying to decide which vacation they will go on or big time internships they will choose for the summer (suspension of disbelief, okay?) and each is shooting in a different direction. Parker will join super uptight parents in Denver, Piz will either stay in LA with a semi-lame gig (obviously so he can be close to Veronica) or head cross country to intern for Pitchfork (umm, yeah, right). Unlike Piz, Veronica shows no qualms about ditching Cali for a super cool FBI internship in Virginia. Mac meanwhile has fallen into "the black hole that is new love," with a kind of funny looking partner: Max, the philosophical professional cheater. But she's starting to freak out (as all freshmen should...) that she has a housewife/townie future ahead of her if she sticks with Max, who is flunking out and planning to live off campus and sell more cheat sheets. Oh, and did I mention, Wallace is going to Africa? AFRICA? I know they haven't been close lately, but whatever will V do without her trusty sidekick? Oh wait, we don't have to think about that BECAUSE DAWN OSTROFF IS MAKING SURE THESE CHARACTERS DON'T LIVE TO SEE ANOTHER SCHOOL YEAR.

Okay, I've composed myself. And while Veronica ignores the fact that the newly-formed couple will be spending the summer apart, she perfectly explains the appeal of Piz- to both Veronica and the VMars audience: "How's Pizneyland?" asks Mac. "There aren't many rollercoasters, but I think I can do without the adrenaline and nausea."

As for the show's resident macho men Logan and Dick, their South American surf trip is foiled by the return of dun! dun! dun! Big Dick! Standing creepily on the balcony he explains to Dick that he's turning himself in but has a few months before his incarceration to spend with his son. And Dick flips his shit, rightly so, digging up Beaver's memory and laying the guilt on thick. About time Dick got to act. Logan, on the other hand, is falling into his same old act: trying not to be the disappointing boyfriend he plays so well. Perpetually trying to change and perpetually being kicked back down, Logan seems as downtrodden as ever--and totally still pining for Veronica. Remember? They're epic.

Just before that blast from the past shows up, Keith, caught up in a potentially election-ruining "crime wave" of robberies, has a chat with the adorable Liam Fitzpatrick, who brings up our favorite slutty step-mom, Kendall Casablancas. I still stand by my gut feeling: She's totally not dead if we didn't see her die. Hell, I might even doubt it if we did see her die.

Time to start planning the season/series finale party kids. I'll bring the crackers and cheese, you bring the Le Baron pinata.

Posted by Alyce on May 18, 2007 12:43 AM
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