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Supernatural Fodder

Supernatural: Meat Swap

Sam walks up to a bar.

"Good evening, barkeep. I'd like to purchase an alcohol, please."

"Uh, huh. What can I get you?" the bartender asks.

"Well, I'm 26, see, it's on my ID."

"Congratulations, what can I get you?" the bartender replies, not even bothering to turn around.

"A banana daiquiri, my good man."

A blonde sitting at the bar takes an interest in him. Sam introduces himself as "Gary", and shakes her hand. She asks him if he's having a good time tonight. "Gary" says it's been the best night ever. She asks if maybe it can get better.

"Maybe. I don't know."

She asks if "Gary" wants to get out of there. "Gary" says he likes that bar, plus he just ordered this daiquiri. She asks if he wants to leave with her.

"Are you asking me to have the sex with you?" he asks, almost choking on his drink. She says yes, and they leave.

Cut to 36 hours earlier

Favor to an old friend

Sam and Dean are in Massachusetts to help out an old friend. She was a maid at a motel John used to stay at while hunting, and used to babysit the brothers in his absence. The friend's family has a poltergeist problem. It has attacked them, even scratching the words "murdered chylde" on their teen daughters belly. Sam and Dean suggest the family leave town for a few days while the Winchesters take care of business. They take the suggestion.

Service with a snarl

At the local diner Dean orders a burger while Sam borders a health salad shake. Dean makes sure to tell the cashier that it's not for him.

Sam and Dean eat and talk about the case while in the background, barely visible, the cashier watches.

Dean mentions that the babysitter looked good. Sam is amazed, Dean still has a crush on the babysitter?

"What? No!" Dean says. "I mean, she's got a nice family." He's all wistful about the settled life they got a glimpse of.

Sam is skeptical, but changes the subject to the case.

The house used to belong to Isiah Pickett. Local legend says that a witch named Maggie Briggs was hanged in the backyard. No word on a murdered child or where the body is though.

The camera cuts to the cashier who is watching Sam with an evil look.

Later that night Sam is alone talking to Dean on his cell. He has had no luck tracking down more info on Maggie Briggs. He cuts through a vacant lot and hears a noise.

He turns and is hit by a dart in the neck. After a moment he crumples to the ground.

Sam comes to in a forest wearing a uniform from the diner the Winchesters ate at earlier. He walks along deserted road as a police car pulls up. The officer calls him Gary and tells him his family is worried about him. Sam thinks the officer means Dean. He gets in the car.

The squad car pulls up to a house that Sam doesn't recognize and a middle-aged man and women run out to scold him for worrying them.

Sam tells them to back off. They think he's been drinking.

As they argue Sam gets a look at himself in the squad cars window. He's in the body of the diner cashier.

Sam, unnaturally

"Sam" is flexing in the mirror. Dean walks in. "Sam" hands him a burger. Dean is pleased, but surprised. "Sam" tells him they have to eat it on the road, the maid saw Dean's arsenal, which is laid out for cleaning, and freaked out a little. Dean says he's going to "hit the head" and then they can leave. "Sam" begins packing up, but first finds Dean's cell. Then he goes to the Impala, and searches it, finding Dean's many backup phones. He collects them all, and dumps them.

Dean comes out, and "Sam" asks if he can drive. Dean reluctantly agrees, puzzled. "Sam" revs the motor for a second or two, and Dean tells him they need to get going. "Sam" puts Metallicar into gear.

"Reverse," Dean says.

"Sam" looks down, checks the rear view.

"Reverse," Dean says, again.

"Sam" looks behind him, looks forward, and steps on the gas.

"Reverse!" Dean shouts, as Metallicar speeds backward into the dumpster behind them.

"It's in reverse!" Dean says, too late.

"Sam" apologizes, but Dean is ticked. So much for "Sam" driving.

Breakfast at Gary's

The next morning Sam frantically tries to get through to Dean without success. He begins to search Gary's room, finding nerdy, but normal, teen stuff, until he finds a ceremonial knife hidden in a box.

Gary's mother calls Gary to breakfast. Sam resists at first, then joins the family. Gary's dad wants to talk about the previous night. Sam doesn't. Gary's dad asks him how last night fits in with the plan.

"Listen, buddy, no offense, but right now I could give a rat's ass about your plan." Sam exclaims.

He breaks the awkward silence that follows by asking questions about his recent behavior. He asks if he has shown an interest in the occult? Has he shown an interest in Latin? Has he been reading an old book? He takes a bite of toast, and Gary's mom tells him "No!". Gary has a gluten allergy.

Later when Sam gets out of the bathroom, Gary's sister is waiting on him. She tells him the parents will freak if they find out about the book. Sam asks her if she knows where he hides it.

Hunt prep

Meanwhile, Dean and "Sam" are prepping for their big day of "tombstone rolling" as Dean puts it. They have to find Maggie Briggs' body and burn it. "Sam" excitedly says that Maggie isn't buried in a cemetery, she's buried in the basement of the house. Maggie wasn't hanged as a witch, Isiah Pickett actually killed Maggie because she was carrying his illegitimate child. Dean says that explains the "murdered chylde" scratches, and asks how Sam knows this. "Sam" says he's done lots of research on this, uh, last night.

They get in the Impala, and Bob Seger is playing. "Sam" tells Dean to turn it up.

"Seriously?" Dean asks, looks at "Sam" and turns it up.

Drunk and befriended at school

At school Sam runs into Trevor and Nora, two of Gary's friends. They ask him what happened the night before. Sam tells them he was drunk. They ask him what's wrong. He tells then that he's still drunk, in fact, he's seeing three of them right now. He asks where his locker is.

When no one is around Sam breaks into the locker and finds an old spell book after a brief search. He takes the book and leaves school, only to run into Nora and Trevor again. They tell him that it's not like him to ditch school. He tries to leave them but Trev shoots him in the neck with a dart.

The hunt

Inside the house, Dean searches using the flashlight, while "Sam" watches with the shotgun.

"Master Chief is in the house, bizatches!" "Sam" says.

"You all right?" Dean asks.

"Yeah."

Dean finds Willow Moss.

"That grows over a witch's grave," "Sam" says, excitedly.

"Yeah," Dean says, exasperated.

Dean begins digging. "Sam" steps back, and aims the shotgun at Dean.

"Dude, I'm really sorry about this..." he says, before pulling the trigger.

"Sorry about what?" Dean asks.

"Sam" is suddenly slammed against the wall, losing the shotgun. Dean turns, and goes to help him. "Sam," panicked, says they need to leave right now. Dean tells him they can't, they haven't burned the body.

Suddenly Dean is slammed against the wall. The ghost of Maggie Briggs appears, and attacks Dean. Dean is unable to fight back. Maggie runs at him, then suddenly disappears in a flaming streak. Dean looks up to see the bones burning, with "Sam" triumphantly standing over the remains with a lighter.

Drinking games

Dean and "Sam" are celebrating. "Sam" says it was a fun job. Dean is cynical, it was just a typical ghost hunt. Dean is puzzled when "Sam" orders a cheeseburger, and when he drinks with him. Dean can't recall the last time they drank together (Christmas special, Season 3?). "Sam" tells Dean he's a good guy, a real good guy. Dean is puzzled about the way "Sam" is acting. "Sam" can tell Dean is getting suspicious, so he hits the bar for a drink.

And this is where we came in.

Dean watches "Sam" chatting with the blonde, and then is really puzzled, and thoughtful, when "Sam" leaves with her.

With friends like these

When he comes to, Sam is tied up and Trev is on the phone with Gary. He asks if Gary has killed Dean yet. Gary hasn't but says he will tonight.

Sam is dismayed. He asks them why they want to kill Dean.

Trev tells him that a month ago he, Gary, and Nora were trying some spells from the book when Gary went into a trance and drew a picture of Dean. A demon told them that there was a bounty on Dean's head. If Dean is killed the killer will be rewarded.

Dean, clued. Finally.

Gary arrives back at the motel. He sees Dean's sleeping body in the bed, and takes the pistol off the table. He aims at Dean's sleeping form, and pulls the hammer back.

But Dean is standing in the shadows beside him. "Sam" senses this, and turns, but it's too late. Dean knocks him out.

Trevor's reward

Trev wants to claim the reward so he performs a summoning spell. He thinks it doesn't work at first, but Nora becomes possessed.

Sam tells Trev he's a moron and that he doesn't know what demons are like. Trev ignores him. When Trev tries to claim his reward, the demon gets Dean's location from Trev but doesn't offer a reward. Trev asks for his reward, more aggressively this time.

Sam yells, "Run, you moron!"

The demon counter offers by killing Trev. Blood runs out of Trev's mouth and the demon's hand is covered in it. She licks it off her hand, saying "Mmmmm. Tastes just like moron."

Gary explains

"Sam" regains consciousness. Dean has him tied up, and threatens to waterboard him if he doesn't talk. "Sam" tells him everything. Dean unties him, telling him they are going to get Sam back in his body. But the demon arrives, and attacks Dean. Dean is knocked unconscious. The demon talks to Gary, and tells him he can have his reward, anything he wants.

Gary says he wants to be the most powerful witch in the world. The demon says he can have that. But first, he has to meet his dark God. Gary pauses.

"You mean, the Devil?" he asks.

The demon says yes. She says he's going to ask him one question, and all he has to say is "Yes."

Gary balks. This is a bit more than he bargained for. The demon threatens him.

But Dean is awake, and tries to stab the demon with Ruby's knife.

She fights back. But Gary begins an exorcism. The demon turns on him, and attacks him. But Dean, catching on, continues the Latin spell. The demon turns on Dean, and Gary continues.

Dean has the almost final words.

"Adios, bitch," he says. Nothing happens.

"That's 'audi nos', idiot," Gary says ('hear us'?). The demon disappears in a cloud of black smoke.

Trading places

Back at Trevor's house, Gary incants a spell, and Sam and Gary are in their rightful bodies again. The Winchesters drive Gary and Nora to Gary's house. (Gary and Nora seem surprisingly okay with Trevor's death.)

Sam tells Gary that he has a nice life. Gary is skeptical, he tells Sam that he should know better, having lived it for a day. Sam tells him that he just needs to rebel, a little, and not in a Satanic way. He also tells Gary that Nora's interest isn't in Satan, she has a crush on Gary.

Gary is surprised, but he goes inside with Nora, presumably to be arrested for the Satanic ritual death of Trevor that undoubtedly will be discovered in a day or so.

"That was a nice thing to say," Dean tells Sam.

"I totally lied. Kid's life sucks ass," Sam says.

They get in the Impala. "All that apple pie crap, it's stressful. Trust me, we didn't miss anything," Sam continues.

"Or we don't know what we're missing," Dean says.

Dean starts the car, and Seger begins playing.

"Dude, turn that crap down," Sam says.

"Welcome back, Kotter," Dean mutters, as he drives off.


Posted by Miller on January 29, 2010 7:13 AM
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