It's been weeks and weeks, it seems, since the last new episode. "Secretary's Day" is directed by Steve Carell and written by Mindy Kaling, so I expect a gem. Or at least some slow-clapping of my no-nonsense decision-making.
Intro:
There's an amazing viral video of Kevin's voice as the Cookie Monster, made by Oscar. Even Angela, who hates fun, likes it.
"This is my favorite day" - Angela
Main:
Andy tries to be sweet and get the whole office to celebrate Secretary's Day. Dwight brings in a bushel of beets. Creed brings in a stuffed bear.
"If it wasn't for secretaries, I wouldn't have a step-mom" - Andy
Michael, begrudgingly, asks the rube Erin to lunch. She is super excited. Michael doesn't like Erin all of a sudden? He used to think she was cool, because she respected him so much.
Of course Michael has "Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire" on tape. If you thought Mo'Nique was good in the movie, just wait until she's on audio cassette! But Erin wants to talk instead .... and talk ... and talk. I chuckled as she asked Michael about his favorite day, or month.
And we get to learn she used to work at a Taco Bell Express, but was overwhelmed when it became a regular Taco Bell. And she loved April when she was 7.
But then Michael dishes how Andy used to date Angela, and Erin didn't know. How could that not have come up? And then we get to see Ellie Kemper (Erin) get her true improv comedy on, as she starts looking like Cousin Itt from the Addam's Family.
"In the foster home, my hair was my room" - Erin
Andy is oblivious that Erin is upset, and, in typical Andy fashion, busts out a guitar (not the banjo?) for an original song, "Secretary of Love" whicCAKE TO THE FACE! It's on like Donkey Kong. Erin is pissed, Andy is in the dog house, and Angela is disgusted people remember she and Andy were at one point Andgela.
Pam's words of wisdom (remember, she was engaged to Roy before being with Jim) fall on deaf ears. But it was nice of her to try. Erin decides to be on her own, much like Precious in "Precious: Based on the novel 'Push' by Sapphire." God, that joke is still funny for some reason. Andy better be prepared for some fried pig's feet.
But Michael does what Michael does best: Make his employees feel better. So maybe Erin and Andy can get back together.
Subplot:
Poor, sweet Kevin thinks Oscar is making fun of Cookie Monster and is only just catching on that they are making fun of him. So he gets that guy from Sabre (who I forgot even still works there) to stick up for him.
Except that guy A) Wants to leave parodies to "the good people at MadTV" and B) Has no idea what he's up against.
But then he starts doling out two-day unpaid suspensions like, well, cookies.
"C is for Suspension" - Illiterate Kevin
But it turns out that guy (really, is it worth knowing his name? He's a plot device ... anyway, it's Gabe) has no real authority, so Pam and Jim just walk right out, while oblivious Dwight offers to kiss his hand like he's the king. Kiss the pimp hand, Dwight.
Kevin's revenge plot - a viral video with Oscar's voice for the Count on Sesame Street - falls flat, although I love that Kevin figured Oscar is an accountant and would be a perfect fit for the Count.
"Why didn't you do Oscar the Grouch?" - Oscar
Oh, and Pam's finally back from her maternity leave. Dwight offers to milk her, not unlike Greg Focker saying he used to milk cats into a little saucer.
"This is going to traumatize me a hell of a lot more than you" - Dwight, as he puts on hand sanitizer and prepares to milk Pam.
Pam finds her breast pump. On Meredith's boob.
Thoughts:
Dwight Good: The episode felt a little scattered - at times it was going for character development, at times it was going for meta humor, at times it was like an old-fashioned Office episode with lots of little quips from all the characters. But it still made me laugh, and isn't that the primary reason we watch? It was nice to see more of Erin (loved her doing the hair covering thing), and Dwight was in fine form asking to milk Pam, which is totally a Dwight thing to do.
Nice touches:
"This is like the Cadillac of breast pumps" - Meredith (how often does she use one???)
What did you think? Leave a comment, and vote in the poll...And follow me on Twitter @officetvfodder