How I Met Your Mother Fodder

How I Met Your Mother: First Time In New York

We recall the first date with Robin and how quickly Ted said "I love you" and how different things were now and the stages of getting to say "I love you" which they had not done yet. Robin tells Ted that her sister Katie is visiting and he says they should go to the Empire State building. Suddenly she says "Falafel." I know that would be awesome for me.

At La Guardia, Robin tells Lily about this and it comes out she has never told a guy she loves him. This brings up Barney's Freeway theory of relationships. He labels the exits 6 hours, 4 days, 3 weeks, 7 months, a year and a half, 18 years, and death. Robin says usually by now she would want to take an exit by now and Lily says she once dated a man who couldn't use the toilet unless classical music was playing.

They spot Katie and she seems to be making out with some guy who is her boyfriend. He calls both Robin and Lily hot. Katie says it is going to be a "special night" so to speak. Later, Robin asks for help to talk Katie out of this "special night".

The next day they are at the Empire State building where Ted fake impresses everyone with his architectural knowledge and everyone compares visiting the Empire State Building to what Katie is obviously planning on doing other than Barney who says, "Sex is fun!" Katie says she has been dating Kyle forever and she has already put the information on her Myspace page. Robin says she should be drinking yoo hoo not having sex. They all recall their first time and Barney says his first time was when he was a teacher at a camp and we get a Dirty Dancing flashback - actually it is Dirty Dancing but with Barney. It is obvious Barney made it up.

Marshall and Lily remember their first time in college. Lily says she wants to make it special, like New Year's Eve - they can light candles. Suddenly, it is twelve minutes later and they are post-coital. Apparently Ted was also there.

Robin tells her story of being 16 with her boyfriend Brian. Brian is pretty excited to start when suddenly he says he is gay. Apparently they technically had sex and Lily argues whether "being in the shallow end of the pool" counts. Marshall realizes that perhaps this means that Lily has been with someone else, technically.

Katie then wonders if Robin loves Ted. Ted grabs Robin and they discuss this. Robin says she's not yet ready to get in the carpool lane (by saying it) because that leads to diamonds and she doesn't want to say it too soon - like he did. She says he is an "I Love You" slut. He takes back his "I Love You" and gives it to a random guy who decides not to commit suicide.

Marshall can't believe Lily was with Scooter first and this rewrites their history. Lily says being in the lobby is not like being in the building.

Robin tells Katie she shouldn't make the same mistakes as her and she shouldn't be in such a rush to grow up. The good news is that she didn't do it. It turns out that Ted turned her against it later by talking with her about his first time which was with a girl named Molly, whom he did not love but said he did. He never saw her again, for that matter and just said he loved her for sex. Apparently when she told Kyle she wanted to wait he broke up with her. It turns out later that the story was actually reversed and it was Molly who did all the things he said he did. Suddenly Robin tells Ted that she loves him and he says he's gay but is just kidding. He tells her she has lost her "iloveyouginity."

They go again to the Empire State Building and Barney says they were just there yesterday and Marshall says it didn't count and Lily ahas him.

The next night they all press for Barney's first time and after giving a few 80's movies references he says he was 23 and was with his mother's 45 year old friend. They then ask him to tell all about his time at the Catskills at camp and we get to sing... I had the time of my life....

-- Gordon Davidescu