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American Idol: Philadelphia Auditions

We can't blame the writers' strike on this one. Fox knows how to milk "American Idol" -- milk 'em good!

The show started off in Philly. There was a bit of brotherly love to be had; however, as many of us know, the auditions are all about the freaks. You know how baseball games don't show fans making jackasses of themselves on the field? AI might learn a lesson there. Some of these people seem to be auditioning to be the next William Hung.

Case in point: Alexis Cohen. Sure, she was like Rainbow Brite on acid and she smelled of incense. However, they spent way too much time on this chick. I knew more about her than I knew about some of last season's top 10. That's just wrong. That said, the visit to her apartment made me sad. I was sort of hoping that her singing talent would triumph over her freakiness and tiny studio and bed/couch. Thanks for sucking me in -- or just sucking. The art wasn't half-bad, but Simon's assessment of her looking like Willem Dafoe circa Spider-Man was better. Maybe Dafoe can help her get an "actressing" job.

Enough dragging it out; here are just a few other favorites!
• Alaa had a bit of a Borat thing going on. He make sexy time... not so much singing time.
• Temptress Brown did seem sweet -- for a female football player. However, the hair, the lips and the shirt were all clashing. I know she is only 16, but Simon was way too kind.
• If I could, I would already start dialing for Angela Martin.
• That Milo guy should have to write an apology note to every viewer out there. If you don't make the age requirements, you are automatically wasting everyone's time.
• The guy dressed as Princess Leia (see photo above). Enough said... or Paula stated, "I can't get past the chest hair."
• Paul, the Paula stalker... I sort of liked his song, but I was wondering where the Princess Leia outfit was.

That's all that I have the energy for; did I miss any of your freaky favorites? -- Rachel Cericola

Posted by on January 15, 2008 11:19 PM
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